Growth as all cosmic movements has a direction, and that’s where its success lies
How often are we told things like “you are just too sensitive”… or like “have some fun, you don’t have to be serious all the time”…
How do we usually take those remarks?
There are three ways we can react:
2- Get defensive
3- Give it a thought
To be totally honest, it is not easy on our egos to receive such accusations. And yes, they might be totally wrong, and yes they might be communicated in the most aggressive ways..
But let’s take a moment to reflect on how we can turn these frequent moments of awkwardness into opportunities for growth.
- First, if we are quick to dismiss the remark and feel totally desensitized to it, then it is worth asking ourselves the question: but what if they are right? What if they see something in us we are failing to realize?
- Second, we must realize that if we are angered at all by those statements then it’s our ego acting out. And that is a little member of the family we really need to keep in check. What better moment than now?
So here is a quick exercise.
Ask your ego what made it angry, be curious about the thoughts swirling around in your mind. It might just let you in on a few secrets that prove relevant to your growth.
- Do you fear they might be right?
- - Do you feel misunderstood and believe they are wrong? But remember that, if you know they are wrong and you are well anchored in your confidence, then you probably should not be angry at all.
It’s really simple: Would you rather grow or be right?
- If growth is our priority then we may as well learn to turn a disadvantageous situation into a meaningful one. The best way to do so is to ask: What can I learn? Is there something I can learn about myself? Is there something that I need to bring out of the unconscious realm into my awareness?
Can we change? Yes, definitely. We all can.
It takes faith, willpower, and some guidance.
Is it worth changing?
Well… I believe there is no doubt that progress inevitably requires change.
The challenge is to know How to change.
What are we supposed to be changing into? Or moving towards?
The answer is simple;
Balance is the key ingredient to success.
For example, without sensitivity the world would be devoid of communication. With too much sensitivity communication becomes a burden. What we want to achieve is just the right amount of sensitivity that keeps us connected to our brethren and the world we inhabit, without it jeopardizing our health by causing us excessive anxiety, or threatening our relationships by being overbearing.
To achieve that balance we need to work through the layers that have tipped the weight in one direction or the other.
When we heal through our wounds and discipline our mind-body in obedience to Allah we find alignment with the cosmic order, physical and metaphysical alike. In that we find balance, whether it be in character or personality, thoughts, emotions, or deeds.
When there is balance there is wisdom. Wisdom is giving each thing its proper place.
Where there is wisdom there is justice.
We have, to help us on that journey, the best of guides, our Beloved Prophet Muhammad ﷺ who embodies balance, wisdom, and justice in his being and his example.
This is always the best place to begin.
Qur’ān. [2: 143]
﴿وَكَذلِكَ جَعَلناكُم أُمَّةً وَسَطًا لِتَكونوا شُهَداءَ عَلَى النّاسِ وَيَكونَ الرَّسولُ عَلَيكُم شَهيدًا وَما جَعَلنَا القِبلَةَ الَّتي كُنتَ عَلَيها إِلّا لِنَعلَمَ مَن يَتَّبِعُ الرَّسولَ مِمَّن يَنقَلِبُ عَلى عَقِبَيهِ وَإِن كانَت لَكَبيرَةً إِلّا عَلَى الَّذينَ هَدَى اللَّهُ وَما كانَ اللَّهُ لِيُضيعَ إيمانَكُم إِنَّ اللَّهَ بِالنّاسِ لَرَءوفٌ رَحيمٌ﴾
And thus We have made you a median [i.e., just] community that you will be witnesses over the people and the Messenger will be a witness over you. And We did not make the qiblah which you used to face except that We might make evident who would follow the Messenger from who would turn back on his heels. And indeed, it is difficult except for those whom Allāh has guided. And never would Allāh have caused you to lose your faith [i.e., your previous prayers]. Indeed Allāh is, to the people, Kind and Merciful.
هُوَ ٱلَّذِي بَعَثَ فِي ٱلۡأُمِّيِّـۧنَ رَسُولٗا مِّنۡهُمۡ يَتۡلُواْ عَلَيۡهِمۡ ءَايَٰتِهِۦ وَيُزَكِّيهِمۡ وَيُعَلِّمُهُمُ ٱلۡكِتَٰبَ وَٱلۡحِكۡمَةَ وَإِن كَانُواْ مِن قَبۡلُ لَفِي ضَلَٰلٖ مُّبِينٖ
He it is Who hath sent among the unlettered ones a messenger of their own, to recite unto them His revelations and to make them grow, and to teach them the Scripture and wisdom, though heretofore they were indeed in error manifest.
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